Oooo - a Photobucket meme

Judy has tipped me off again to a meme. This one involves Photobucket, so I had to play!

THE RULES:

You need 2 internet windows open to do it (not a problem - I usually have like 6 open at any given moment):
1. Go to www. photobucket.com
2. Type in your answer to the question in the "search" box
3. Use only the first page
4. Copy the html and paste for the answer. (Or in my case, I uploaded the picture to the blog.)


THE QUESTIONS:

1. What is your first name? (the one I use, anyway...)



2. What is your favorite candy?



3. What is your relationship status?



4. What is your favorite color?



5. Who is your celebrity crush?



(Hey, go easy on me - I just saw "Sixteen Candles" on TV this past weekend...)

6. What is your favorite band? (This week it's...)



7. What is your favorite movie?



8. What is your favorite past time?



9. What is your job?



10. What do you do for fun?



11. What kind of car do you drive?



12. What is your favorite TV show?



(When is it coming back???)

13. One word to describe yourself:



Your turn!!

Yo, yo, yo.

I'm feelin' street today. Step off! Don't be a hater. And don't be gettin' all up in my chili with yo cracker 'tude. This ain't no thang but a chicken wang. Fo shizzle.

Word.

I do love flowers.

I'm coming to you today from beautiful East Texas! I realize that last time I went to East Texas, I wasn't so impressed, but I'm in the Piney Woods area today, in Nacogdoches, and I must say, it's lovely. I'm sure the springtime weather and flowers don't hurt, but it also helps that this is a college town, so unlike the last town I was in, the town doesn't show any signs of running down. College students kind of force a town to keep up.

That's not to say it's a town courting the youth vote. When I got here yesterday, I discovered that it's azalea time here in Nacogdoches. I know what you're thinking. "It's spring. It's azalea time everywhere!" (I'm like a mind reader, aren't I?) But it's a different thing here in Nacogdoches. I can't tell you what dates exactly constitute the azalea season, but I can tell you that we're clearly in it. When I checked into my hotel, I was the only one in the lobby under the age of 60, and that's sayin' something because the lobby was crowded. A full roster of oldsters had been bussed in to come look at the azaleas. There's a 20-mile trail of them. I hope they provide Rascals, because otherwise, most of the people I saw in the lobby aren't going to finish that trail.

Me? I'll be missing it altogether. I'm working inside all day today, and then I've got to make the 4-hour drive back to Austin. So, no azaleas for me. But should you want to see a lovely display of them, I know right where to send you.

Pot o' melted bliss

Fondue rocks. The restaurant I went to last night was The Melting Pot (as Judy guessed!). It was my first time at a fondue restaurant of any kind, and I will definitely go back!

I went with a bunch of my co-workers for the restaurant's "Ladies' Night" package. It included a cheese course, a main course and a dessert course for $23. Not cheap, but very good. And instead of the main course, you can get a salad and that drops the price to $18. They also have a full bar and wine list. Here's how it works.

We had 8 adults and 2 kids (actually there were 7 adults and 3 kids, but one of the kids was 10 and ate what the adults ate, so she counts as an adult). So, we selected 4 fondue pots for each course. In that scenario, you can choose 4 different flavors for each pot, or all the same, or any combination therein.

For the cheese course, you have about 6-8 flavors to choose from. We did a traditional Swiss, a Caribbean, a cheddar and a spinach and artichoke. For dipping into the cheese pots, we were given bread (several different flavors cubed), veggies and apples. You could fill up on that alone, but we had 2 courses to go!

For the main course, you choose from 4 different cooking "styles" - essentially they're marinades or broths that boil at your table in the fondue pots, and you put items in the pots and cook them. You're also given 5 sauces to dip the cooked food in. We choose 2 different "styles" - a coq a vin and another herbed kind. And the items we were given to cook were beef, chicken, shrimp, raviolis, broccoli, squash and potatoes. The potatoes took way too long to cook, and we all pretty much gave up and just ate them crunchy (i.e. undercooked), which was lame. But everything else cooked really well and tasted great - especially with the sauces!

After that was the dessert course. There were 6-8 choices for dessert fondue - all chocolate based. We chose a chocolate with peanut butter; a turtle one, which had chocolate, caramel and pecans; a cookies and cream one; and a s'mores one. And to dip in the sauces, we were given plates with strawberries, pound cake, rice krispy treats, marshmallows covered in orea or graham cracker crumbs, graham crackers, and possibly a few other sweets I'm forgetting.

It was all very good, and it was a fun atmosphere - something I highly recommend for a celebration. But do plan to make an evening of it. It took us 3 hours to run through all 3 courses - an hour or more than I'd anticipated, and that was more time that I'd generally want to spend on a weeknight. But as a Friday or Saturday thing with a group, it's a great way to spend a fun evening. Not only do you all decide as a group what fondues to order, but if you get all different one, everyone is forced to get up and mingle to get to the various pots, so it makes for a very interactive atmosphere.

We had a great waiter who was very patient with us trying to figure out what we were doing. Thanks Austin (that's his name - I'm not thanking the city)! I'll be back with an even rowdier crowd in the future. :)

The bunny didn' leave me no malted milk eggs.

I hope everyone had a happy Easter! Mine was quiet, but involved sunny weather, UT winning it's NCAA tournament game and homemade rolls, so you know it was all good.

My bracket has been looking really good, though I've taken some hits with the Duke and Connecticut losses. In the contest I play in, I had the top spot going into yesterday's games. I'll have to see after the moderator updates everything how yesterday's games affected my standing. Hopefully I'm still rockin' the free world in the #1 spot! There's no money involved in the one I play - just glory. But glory is a glorious thing, I always say.

Not too much else to talk about this fine Monday. I'm going to a fondue restaurant tonight, so I'll give you a review tomorrow, but my hopes are high. Melted cheese and chocolate. Hard to go wrong.

Denied

So, I didn't get to watch any games online yesterday. The NCAA page was convinced that I needed to run Explorer and upgrade my Windows Media Player in order to watch. Just one problem: I *was* running Explorer, and I upgraded to the newest Windows Media Player - two generations ahead of what they said I needed.

I never could get it to work, so I gave up and just watched the scoreboards. I kicked-eth ass. I only had one loss yesterday by the time I went to bed at 10:00 p.m., and I think my last three teams were ahead at that point, all going into their second halves. I did lose the play-in game, so if that counts, I've had 2 losses so far. But that's pretty damn good!

Unfortunately, I left my bracket at home today - it's sitting on my coffee table. So, I'm not sure who all I need to root for today. I may remember some of my picks, but I definitely won't remember them all. It's not as much fun when you don't know who to root for!

The madness! The madness!

It's hoops time bay-bee!!! I got my bracket in two days ago. I got my NCAA On-Demand account all set up and ready to give live feed on my computer...you know, while I work diligently and don't let it interfere in any way with my job duties. I got my Longhorns picked to bring it on home to San Antonio.

In other words, I'm ready! Bring on March Madness!!

Oh, the glory of "things"

I got a new toy! I have achieved a dream of several years now. As a TV junkie and hipster, it has pained me no end to go without a TiVo lo these many years. But those days are over!

DVR is in the hoooooouse!

I got a flyer from Dish Network that they had a new DVR package. The package would allow me to have the same programming I have now, plus DVR service, for less than I'm currently paying. Well, duh!

I called to make sure it wasn't all too good to be true, and it tweren't. So, I did an upgrade on my satellite box, which only cost me $25, $10 of which I can get back if I send them my old box, and I signed up for the new service. I'm obligated to 2 years, and as of next January, they can (and probably will) jack up the price from the package price I'm going to be getting from now until then, but I doubt they'll jack it up too dramatically (Dish has been really good about that since I've had them, and that's 5 years now), so I feel comfortable with locking myself in that long. I don't generally like to obligate myself to more than a year on service of any kind, but I don't change stuff like that too often, so I'm not too concerned.

Anyway! The new box arrived Monday, so all the wires and plugs were wired and plugged into their proper spots that night, and last night I carefully read through the manual to see how to actually use the thing. I played around a bit, getting familiar with my new remote (I think we all know the horror of a new remote), and last night I did some test taping to my new DVR. When I get home tonight, I'll see if it worked!

I'm so excited! I will now have hours and hours of TV that I can't possibly all watch! NIRVANA!!

A little OCD.

I think I have just a touch of OCD. Just a touch!

Some people have to lock the door three times before they can leave the house, or they have to turn the water on and off four times to be sure it's off. With me, it's the garage door. I may have blogged about this before (I'm too lazy to look it up), but I frequently drive off down the street after backing out of my garage and can't remember if I've closed the garage door. Invariably, I have to turn around and go back and check. Invariably, it's closed.

I had one of those moments this morning. Bad timing really, because for some reason I don't know, the traffic has suddenly gotten horrendous getting out of my neighborhood in the morning, and delaying myself even by a couple of minutes to soothe my compulsive mind that the garage door IS closed - as it always is - throws a real monkey wrench into my commute.

But I had to do it. I had to go back. I had to be sure. I just couldn't drive off to work, unsure whether my garage door was standing open. So, I went back. It was closed.

I can't be the only one with this affliction. Surely, there's *something* that each of you out there is OCD about! What is it?? What are you obsessive-compulsive about???

Spring is coming

What an insanely beautiful day here in fabulous Austin, Texas. It's supposed to hit 80 today. It's March 14, people! I'm sure this means we're in for some kind of blistering summer, but hey, it's a gorgeous day and I won't complain.

We've had a really mild winter. In fact, on my way to Galveston on Wednesday, I saw the first roadside bluebonnet photo shoot of the season. A mother had pulled over along the highway just east of La Grange and had her kids out in the first bluebonnet blooms I've seen this year taking photos. Usually, the blooming season doesn't really kick in until April, and then you have to ramp up your "alert driver" sensor, because anywhere there's a patch of grass along the roadside, there's a chance someone may have pulled over to take pictures.

That's a tradition here for you non-Texans who don't know. All Texan children MUST have a picture in a field of bluebonnets taken at least once before their 18th birthday. You can take one every year if you like, and you can take as many as you like once you're past 18, but any parent who allows their child to reach adulthood without immortalizing their childhood against a backdrop of bluebonnets has to hand in their Texan card. I think it's a law. Someone should look it up.

A meme.

This carries the risk of bringing back bad memories, but I'm taking on a meme from Judy's blog about 9th grade. Let's see what I can remember!

Who was your best friend? Laurie.

Who did you go out with? Tim

Did you have a crush on anyone? Well, there was Tim. But I also always liked John W. He was dreammmmy.

Did you buy your lunch? Sometimes...most of the time? I honestly don't remember if I brought my lunch in 9th grade!

Did you skip? No, although I did skip a pep rally once! Our pep rallies were first thing in the morning, so you could blow it off, be late and still make all your classes.

Did you get suspended/expelled? No.

What was your favorite class? Hmmm...I didn't take Choir my freshman year, so I honestly don't remember a particularly enjoyable class in 9th grade.

What was your mascot? The Rams!

Did you go to the dances? I don't think we had dances. So, if we did, I guess that's a no!

If you could go back would you? Not for Bill Gates' money.

Where did you sit at lunch? No particular spot that I remember, though usually the South cafeteria (We had two - North and South. It was a huge school.).

Who was your science teacher? Don't begin to remember.

Who was your English teacher? You'd think I'd remember this one, but I got nothin'.

Who was your history teacher? I'm sure I must had history in 9th grade...

Who was your math teacher? Crime in Italy, did I even GO to my classes???

Did you think you were cool? Of course - my boyfriend was a Junior.

Describe your outfits in ninth grade? Jeans and OP t-shirts.

Who was your favorite teacher? See the above problem regarding remembering teachers.

What was your most memorable moment? I remember Laurie and I dancing in the stadium bleachers one time while our boyfriends were playing a JV football game. For some reason, we thought we were invisible. We were mortified later to find out both teams had been watching us the whole time.

What were your least favorite memories? Being alive and 15. And having the only fight of my entire life...with the girl my boyfriend cheated on me with. I know - I beat up the wrong person.

What was your best accomplishment? Not getting suspended over the aforementioned fight.

What action do you regret the most? Tim.

What did you spend the most time doing on weekends? Hanging out with Laurie! I seem to remember there being a lot of mall time.

Did you make any lifelong friendships? Not that year.

Travelin'

Wow, yesterday's post was long! Now I remember why I always just forward those things on email...

Traveling for work today. I get to go to Galveston, one of my favorite places. I won't get to spend much time enjoying it, because I'll be working as soon as I get there and into the evening, then I head back to Austin in the morning. But I'll go to sleep to the sound of waves on the beach and wake up to a view of the sun coming up over the ocean, so it's ALL GOOD!

I'll make sure I have breakfast at the Denny's on the Seawall so I can watch the ocean while I have breakfast. Gotta love Denny's - hashbrowns, baby, hashbrowns.

I'll have to go back down soon when I can play in the water and hang out on the Strand.

I'm Spongebob Squarepants! Awesome!

A friend of mine sent this to me on email, and I liked it, so rather than forwarding it, I'm going to post it here. What cartoon character are you???

Everyone has a personality of a cartoon character. Have you ever asked yourself what cartoon character you most resemble?

A group of investigators got together and analyzed the personalities of well-known and modern cartoon characters. The information that was gathered was made into this test.

Answer all the questions (only 10) with what describes you best, add up all your Points (which are next to the answer that you choose) at the end and look for your results. And don't cheat by looking at the end of the e-mail before you are done!

1. Which one of the following describes the perfect date?

a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.)
b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.)
c) Painting in the park (5 pts)
d) Rock concert (1 pt.)
e) Going to the movies (3 pts.)


2. What is your favorite type of music?

a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.)
b) Alternative (1 pt.)
c) Soft Rock (4 pts.)
d) Country (5 pts.)
e) Pop (3 pts.)


3. What type of movies do you prefer?

a) Comedy (2 pts.)
b) Horror (1 pt.)
c) Musical (3 pts.)
d) Romance (4 pts.)
e) Documentary (5 pts.)


4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could choose one of these?

a) Waiter (4 pts.)
b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.)
c) Teacher (3 pts.)
d) Police (2 pts.)
e) Cashier (1 pt)


5. What do you do with your spare time?

a) Exercise (5 pts.)
b) Read (4 pts.)
c) Watch television (2 pts.)
d) Listen to music (1 pt.)
e) Sleep (3 pts.)


6. Which one of the following colors do you like best?

a) Yellow (1 pt.)
b) White (5 pts.)
c) Sky Blue (3 pts.)
d) Dark Blue (2 pts.)
e) Red (4 pts.)


7. What do you prefer to eat?

a) Snow (3 pts.)
b) Pizza (2 pts.)
c) Sushi (1 pt.)
d) Pasta (4 pts.)
e) Salad (5 pts.)


8. What is your favorite holiday?

a) Halloween (1 pt.)
b) Christmas (3 pts.)
c) New Year (2 pts.)
d) Valentine's Day (4 pts.)
e) Thanksgiving (5 pts.)


9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be?

a) Paris (4 pts)
b) Spain (5 pts)
c) Las Vegas (1 pt)
d) Hawaii (4 pts)
e) Hollywood (3 pts)


10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time with?

a) Someone Smart (5 pts.)
b) Someone attractive (2 pts.)
c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.)
d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.)
e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.)


Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for!

(10-16 points) You are Garfield:

You are very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not see things as you do, but that doesn't mean that you always have to do what is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt you or others.


(17-23 points) You are Snoopy:

You are fun, you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in and you are never are out of style You are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else. You have probably disapp eared for a few days more than once but you always come home with the family values that you learned Being married and having children are important to you, but only after you have had your share of fun times


(24-28 points) You are Elmo:

You have lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to give advice and help out a person in need. You are very optimistic and you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in your life.


(29-35 points) You are SpongeBob SquarePants:

You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend that anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey, it's funny and calm for the most part. Stay away from traitors and jealous people, and you will be stress free.


(36-43 points) You are Charlie Brown:

You are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few Birthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality.


(44-50 points) You are Dexter:

You are smart and definitely a thi nker... Every situation is fronted with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong family principles. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes. Try to do less over thinking every once in a while to spice things up a bit with spontaneity!

He's a Pisces - like me

It's Chuck Norris' birthday. As Chuck is The Man, I know you'll want to send him a birthday greeting, so you should arm yourself with as much information as you can to make sure your greeting stands out. I'm sure he'll be inundated with well wishes, and you wouldn't want to get lost in the shuffle.

So, be sure to visit the Chuck Norris Fact Generator and then come up with your own unique way of wishing this true blue American bad-ass a happy birthday! (But duck after you've offered up the best you've got - if Chuck doesn't like it, he may take your ass out with a round-house to the face.)

Menace on the highway

If you happen to be in Austin at about 5:00 today, you'll probably want to avoid driving. I'm going for my annual eye exam this afternoon, during which they *insist* on dilating my eyes, and then I have to drive myself home - or actually to my parents' house, which is even further and will involve a major highway.

I hate getting my eyes dilated. I wish they wouldn't do it. But it seems to be some non-negotiable thing with this optometrist (or opthamologist or laser-surgery shill or whatever his title is), because they do it EVERY time. I don't remember previous eye doctors doing it every time. In fact, until this doctor, it was rare that I had it done.

I've thought about changing eye doctors, because I'm not always sure they need to do all the stuff they do, but I've been with these people for several years, and it's nice if you have really crappy eyesight and are on "watch" for glaucoma when they have an actual health history for your eyes. They can see over time how things are progressing, etc. So, I stay.

But I just thought I'd put the word out. It's sunny today, and I'll be half-blind (at least up close), so if the entire city would like to just hold off on driving this fine Friday afternoon until around 5:30, that'd be greeeeat. And if you're a traffic cop reading this, I drive a crappy, white four-door sedan, have bushy hair and make a sour face whenever I spot new model Tiburons. Pull me over.

Got me thinking

Patrick Swayze has pancreatic cancer. Apparently, this is the one of the most deadly forms of cancer. I didn't know that until I read the stories about him yesterday. Depending on which news report you read, he's either not having a very optimistic reaction to treatment and has only weeks to live or he's responding well and the doctors are hopeful.

I've had an interesting reaction to the news. I never was all that into Patrick Swayze. I had nothing against him - I even like him for the fact that through all his fame and years in Hollywood, he's still with the woman he married before he was famous, and you never heard of any scandals or anything with him. He seems like a nice and decent guy. I like that. And I admire his dancing. But he never stirred anything in me on that chemical level, and I never thought he was that great of an actor. He was just a nice B-list actor. There are worse things to be.

But when I heard the news about his cancer and possible impending death, instead of just blithely reading it and moving onto the next story, as I usually do with the 25 celebrity stories you get every day, I found myself really thinking about and wondering about what he's going through right now.

What tipped him off that something was wrong? What did he feel and think when he got the diagnosis? What did they tell him about his chances and what they'd have to do regarding treatment? What conversations did he and his wife, Lisa, have then and now? How is she responding? Is he scared? Is she? Is he preparing for the worst while hoping for the best? Is he leaning on her? Is she there for him the way he needs her to be? What about her - does she have someone to help her with what she's going through? Is he reflecting on his life, and if so, what does he think and feel about it? How does he feel about the whole world now knowing - is he used to it? Is it a relief? Is it an intrusion? If his time is possibly limited, what would he really like to do with that time?

He's only 55. And he has the "advantage" of knowing that he might be approaching the end (as opposed to someone like John Ritter who just dropped dead one day). How is he processing and using this knowledge? How would I?

I don't know why his particular situation touched me. But it did. Maybe because he seems like this nice, normal guy who just happened to get famous. He could be you or me. And now he's dealing with something that doesn't care if he's famous. Just like you or me. And it makes me wonder. What if it were me?

Roooooound up!

Okay, here we go.

1. Brett Favre is retiring. I happen to love Brett Favre. I think he's awesome - and not just for what he does on the field, but for the man he is in his personal life as well - and I can understand why Packer fans are disappointed. They thought they'd have him for one more year. But if he's ready to move on to the next phase of his life, then more power to him. He's earned the chance to see what's next.

He's given it his all, and he's been fantastic for the franchise, while also being a great husband, dad and philanthropist. He's lived a well-balanced life, never letting his career or fame or money be his god, making sure that he was there for his wife when she battled cancer and proving that you really can have it all - you can be success at your career and your personal life when you make the decision to be. That's a concept close to my heart these days.

You never heard scandals about him or heard him complaining that his salary wasn't big enough or he wasn't appreciated enough. He just worked hard, did the right things, kept his priorities straight and succeeded on every level. He's the true picture of success, and I think he can walk away without any regrets...on to whatever the rest of his life has in store.

2. Hillary is still in it. She won Texas and Ohio, but didn't pick up a lot of delegates. I'll be curious to see if she and Obama team up. Seems like they'd be unbeatable if they did.

3. Some beeotch at a gas station the other night asked me what year my car was. I told her 2007, to which she responded, "I prefer the older body styles on the Tiburons." I wanted to say, "It's funny that you say that, because from the look of what you're driving, I'd have thought you preferred ugly-ass old, white sedans. But you say older body-style Tiburons?" But instead, I just said, "Oh really?"

What exactly is the point of approaching a stranger for the sole purpose of telling them you don't like what they're driving, wearing, etc.?

4. Salma Hayek, who just had her first child, a baby girl, told the press that she had wanted a boy. Hey Salma, shut the fuck up. On second thought, it's too late - it's been recorded forever in the media, so your daughter can read it when she gets old enough...after she's already heard about it because some mean little kid tells her at school (because the mean little kid's mom is jealous of your gorgeous mom and repeats what you said where the mean little kid can hear it). Just go ahead and line up a therapist now. There's nothing like knowing that from Day One you're a disappointment and not really what your mother wanted. Moron.

5. Nepal's "living goddess" has retired. She's 11. I want to retire. But more importantly, can you retire from being sacred? Word is, she would've been replaced as soon as she got her period (I guess it's hard to maintain a goddess's demeanor when PMS grabs hold of you), but still...can you really just say, "I've decided I'm not a goddess anymore. It's too much trouble. Pick someone else to be holy."?

6. Looks like Lisa Marie Presley may be pregnant. Funny...I don't really care. But it's in the news, so am I supposed to? I've never really liked her. I don't dislike her, but she's always seemed unpleasant to me. She never smiles. I wouldn't think she'd be fun to be around.

What's on all of y'all's minds today?

Bat-nap

We got a bat in the hall.

No, not the kind Babe Ruth used - the kind that fly around and eat mosquitos and people freak out about. But we ain't freakin'. We're Austinites.

For anyone who doesn't live in Austin, this isn't terribly shocking for a downtown building. Central Texas is home to North America's largest colonies of Mexican freetail bats, and one of them is under the Congress Ave. bridge right here in the heart of Austin. So, occasionally, one of the furry little guys finds his way into a building.

As long as the rodent in question is not on the ground, it's usually nothing to worry about. However he got in, he'll probably get back out, and if he's hanging up high like in a Dracula movie, he's just doin' his bat thang, and he's not going to bother you. It's not like a hornets nest where it's just going to get bigger and bigger and sooner or later, someone gets attacked.

If you see one on the ground, though, it's probably sick, and they DO carry rabies, so DON'T TOUCH IT. Call animal control, and they'll come get it.

In any case, as ubiquitous as bats are in these parts, it's still a novelty to spot on napping near the ceiling in the hallway of your office building. So, all day long, we've been checking on him whenever we go down the hall to the bathroom or to a meeting. He hasn't moved. He's sleepin'.

I'd post a picture here, but I don't have a camera with me, and the quality from my camera phone would just look like a tiny blob. We're on the top floor of our building, so I'm guessing he was in the attic, and he got cold last night (temps dipped below freezing), so he found his way to warmer climes, which happened to be our hallway. I wonder if he'll be there tomorrow.

I saw Chuck Woolery.

Seriously. I'm not making that up, and it's not a euphemism. I saw Chuck Woolery yesterday at a coffee shop!

Oh, crime in Italy, you're not going to try and pretend you don't know who Chuck Woolery is, are you? FINE. This is Chuck:


Among other game shows, he hosted Wheel of Fortune before Pat Sajak got the gig, but if you're like me, what you remember him for is Love Connection. Don't even try and tell me you didn't watch Love Connection - unless you're under the age of 30, and then maybe you didn't. For you chil'ren out there, Love Connection was the precursor to Blind Date. People went on set-up dates and then came back to the studio together and reported on camera how it went. There were rarely scenes involving naked hot-tubbing and a lot of bleeping, so you young-uns might not have enjoyed it. But it was fun.

Anyway, I did a little research after spotting him, and it seems he bought a house near Austin in 2006. Who knew? I'm actually glad I didn't know. It makes the fact that I recognized him all the more impressive. Would YOU have recognized him? Even with cheesy highlighted tips in his hair? Yeah, right. Just go ahead and bow to my pop-culture savant-ness. You know you're impressed.

Born to run...back inside

You know your cat is completely domesticated when she's out in the backyard, having a nice time watching birds and chasing bugs, and she stops, comes inside, uses the litterbox, then returns to the backyard.

Murphy, honey, you can go outside.

Lord love the city.

Usually I welcome the opportunity to travel - for work, pleasure, doesn't matter. And I don't even care how far away it is. Chicago, San Antonio - just as good. I'm not in my normal routine, sitting at my desk, looking at the same cars at the same intersection out my window, so it's all good.

And usually, I'm not a city snob. I grew up in a major city, Houston, and I've lived in a moderately sized city the rest of my life, Austin, except for 5 months that I spent in a college town in the Midwest, so it's true that I've spent pretty much my entire life living in cities. But small towns have always been part of my life, and I've always enjoyed them.

My grandparents lived in a small town, and we visited them at least once a month when I was growing up, and as I said, I lived in one for a bit, and several of my friends had family in small towns that I visited with them, and my parents retired to a relatively small town, so I've spent a lot of time there, so I've spent many a day in small towns. I've always liked them. Until this past week.

I had to travel to a small town in East Texas for work this week. Along the drive, which lasted several hours, I passed through a number of small towns, each more depressing than the last. I found myself thinking, as I passed through each one, "If I had to live here, I think I'd kill myself." I thought it about each aspect of each town. "If that's where I had to eat Mexican food..." "If that's where I had to do my grocery shopping, in some rinky dink place called 'Fred's'..." I just kept imagining if each of these towns were "home" how I would feel. And I couldn't drive through fast enough.

Then I got to my destination. The person I had to meet for work was not around when I got there, then when he finally arrived, he said how he didn't know I would be there - despite several emails, me talking to him about it in person a couple of weeks ago, and a phone call earlier this week. I was speechless. How does this person run a business?

I knocked out my work in a hurry, but had to stick around for a meeting a little more than an hour later. I had no intention of hanging out with this moron for all that time, so I excused myself to go looking for a library - see if I could check my email. I stopped at a bank to get directions. They had closed at 2:00. On a Thursday. So, then I started driving around looking for the library. It wasn't that big a town - I was sure to stumble upon it.

Instead, I stumbled on a visitors center. Cool - they could tell me where the library was. If they'd been open. They had closed at 4:00. Okay. Well, they had some maps out front of their building, so I grabbed one. Library = not listed. But all the restaurants, a famous local bakery and a few other vital locations were listed. What the frig, man? This "small town mentality" was about to piss me the hell off. Was ANYONE working?? So, I started out again, just driving.

Then I found it. Sure enough, I'd stumbled upon it. The library. It was open - hurrah! Just one problem: the Internet was down. Naturally. The librarian told me there was some place at the mall, or the "mini mall" as she expressed it, that offered Internet access. So, 2 minutes after parking, I went back to my car...which a local in a piece of shit sedan had just dinged. I was so pissed, I tried to key their car slyly as I got into mine, but their car was so trashed, you couldn't even tell I'd scratched it. Would nothing go right in this town?

I went in search of the mini mall. I never found the mini mall, but I did find the famous bakery. Fine. I'll go sample pastry and drink cheap coffee. Why the hell not? Finally, it was time to go to my business meeting. It was at the town's fru-fru restaurant. The lemon for your tea was in packets on the table, as was the powdered creamer for your coffee. The meal was smothered chicken over rice, of course, and the veggies had been boiled of all color and served next to a salad of iceberg lettuce. I guess the Dairy Queen didn't have enough privacy for the important business matters that needed to be discussed. At least there I could've gotten a pineapple milkshake.

I endured the meeting until it was reasonable to leave, then got back into the car to head the several hours back home. And I got lost. I couldn't get out of the damn town!!

I had originally planned to spend the night there, and I'd been bitter about having to drive all the way back home that night, but by the time the visit was over, I was quite happy to make the drive home. To the CITY where I live. God bless it.