BobSLEIGH? Whatevuh.

I've been very remiss about discussing the Olympics the past two weeks, considering I've watched them pretty much everyday. I don't really know why, all of a sudden, I'm so riveted this year, but I am, and I'm enjoying it, so I'm going with it. Let's discuss.

Bobsledding. Anyone notice that the announcers are saying "bobsled," like normal human beings, but NBC keeps putting it as "bobsleigh" on its graphics? Who calls it a bobsleigh? Um...no one in this country, and that's where you're broadcasting, so don't be annoying. Put bobsled on your graphics. And in two years, I expect the graphics to say "soccer" and not "football" unless Vince Young is playing.

Speed skating. Could Shani Davis be more of an ass? And Chad Hedrick - quit airing your dirty laundry. You guys don't like each other. Got it. When Shani acts like a jerk to a reporter, he outs himself - no need for you to do it, Chad. When he calls you out during a press conference because you're not being a good team member if you don't congratulate him, just decline to discuss it. We know he's a putz. Be the bigger man and refuse to get drawn into his whinefest. We all saw what he said about being there for himself and having no interest in skating with a team, so if he whines now because the team doesn't support him, whose fault is that? Don't worry, Chad - we know the score.

Figure skating. Is this seriously the Olympics? I've never seen so many people choke in my life - men and women. People were falling all over the place, touching the wall, not making their jumps. How did these people get into the Olympics? My friends and I got to the point last night with the female Chinese skater that we were making up our own commentary - the commentary we wish we'd hear. Dick Buttons finally gave up all pretense of trying to be technical and just said, "Oh my god!" when she fell for the third time, and we would have given cash money to Scott Hamilton if he'd have followed up with, "Is she drunk?" Good lord, people. It's the Olympics. Get your game on.

Ice dancing. Loved it. I've never been into it before, but from what I understand, the new scoring system challenged these people to step it up, and I guess they did, because I really enjoyed it this year. And the American couple? Beautiful - great looking, great skating, great presentation. They were awesome. And owwwwwwww, for the Canadian woman who lost her grip during a lift and landed on the ice on her hip. It's not a safe little little nothing sport like it used to be.

Curling. I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I'm all into it now. I have no idea how this ever got into the Olympics in the first place, and I'll hand in my Cool Card if I have to by admitting this, but I've watched *hours* of it in the last 2 weeks. I'm hooked. I swear, if you haven't watched it, give it a shot. It's like darts, bowling, horseshoes - anything that combines strategy and using finesse, rather than brute force, to place a projectile on a specific spot. Not that I've ever watched hours of those sports, much as I refuse to watch poker on t.v., so I can't entirely explain why I'm suddenly glued to the screen, but I'm into it, man. Maybe it's because I could actually see myself playing this, unlike aerial skiing. And the guys are cutie men. This is Joe Polo on the U.S. team. Hi Joe!







I need to take up this sport/game. I won't have to move to Minnesota, will I?

Downhill. One word: Bode. I laugh at you, man. What an arrogant boob you were before the Olympics, and oh, how the mighty have fallen. Choke, choke, choke. Are you talented? No doubt. But talent doesn't overcome a bad personality. Ask Shani Davis.

That's all for now. The Olympics are almost over. Whatever shall I do with my time until March Madness???