Off to cooler climes

This will be my last post for a couple of weeks - I leave tomorrow for Alaska! Woo-hoo! I'm going on a cruise with the parental units, so this makes my first cruise AND my first trip to Alaska. I'm psyched.

There should be some kind of Internet access on the ship, but I don't know what they'll charge for it, so I'm going to assume I won't be using it. If I'm able to, bonus. I managed a 15-minute stint when I went to Mexico last month, so who knows?

I think I've packed appropriately, but it's awfully hard to pack for 30-60 degree temps when it's 93 outside. You just can't get it in your brain what level of layering will be comfortable at that tempertaure. And I have too many clothes. That's certain. I used to be in a long-distance relationship, and I became a freakin' wizard with packing. I got all my stuff for an entire week's trip to London in my suitcase that fits as a carry-on two years ago. I rock with packing.

But this time, I'm having trouble getting even my clothes in my bag. It's the damn sweaters. I may have to rethink some of my outfits and weed out a couple of sweaters. I already took one out. Looks like I made need to whittle it down further, though. I refuse to be cold the whole trip, and I also hate wearing the same clothes the whole time, but I've got to consider my circumstances. I'm going to use some extra space in one of my parents' suitcases for some non-essential stuff, but my basic clothes and toiletries have to stay with me. I don't check that stuff. I got burned checking luggage one time and then not having access to it when a connecting flight left early and stranded me. The airline put us up at a hotel, but wouldn't give us our luggage. I had no deodorant, contact solution, hair stuff, fresh underwear - nothing. I said never again, and I've lived true to that for almost 10 years now. This trip is apparently the test - the longest trip involving a flight since I instituted my "no checked luggage" rule. I'll let you know how it turns out.

Have to run and do some last-minute stuff. Wish me luck in spotting some whales and having nothing stolen!

Just put it in a ponytail and be done with it.

I find people's grooming choices interesting. I'm not talking about hygeine. Everyone needs to take a shower and clean both their body and their hair everyday, and everyone needs to wear deodorant. Anyone convinced they don't need to do those things is living in Filthy, Stinky Dreamland. I'm talking about how you adorn yourself for facing the world.

I've pondered this before, but today it occurred to me as I stood in the motionless line at the post office. Since there was nothing else to look at, I studied the clerk. I've seen her many times and noted in my mind that she wears no makeup, wears 80s too-large glasses, and her hair is shapeless - a bad cut she seems to be trying to grow out without having it shaped, except that it never really gets much longer, meaning someone must be cutting it. They just suck. Must be Supercuts. Anyway, once you notice a thing like that, you tend to look at it everytime you see the person. Has she gotten a good cut yet? Is it any longer? Why doesn't she wear it up? Any makeup yet?

Well, today, I saw that she has colored her formless hair. She hasn't bothered to get a decent cut, but she's attempted to go blond, with marginal results. It's sort of yellow-orangish. This must mean she did it herself at home. I don't begrudge her that. We can't all afford to spend $150 on a professional cut and color at Shee Shee Expensiavo. But all she's done by coloring her hair is draw attention to it. And that's not a good idea. If you're not going to bother to get a good cut going, don't cause it to glow.

I also noticed that she's got fake nails. Now, I personally do not paint my fingernails (nor do I color my hair - I'm too lazy and cheap to keep up with touchups). I paint my toenails, but nail polish on my fingernails feels like lead. It literally makes my fingers feel weighted down. I can't stand that. On top of that, even when I use an undercoat, the chemicals in the polish make my nails split. They look much healthier if I just keep them trimmed and buff them. So, I don't do it, but it's not philosophical. I think it looks nice on other women. But again, what exactly IS your grooming philosophy when you won't put on even minimal makeup, but you'll wear fake, painted nails? I mean, there are levels of grooming.

There's the basic level. At this level, you have a nice haircut that doesn't require much primping, curling, spraying, etc. You don't wear makeup, and your nails are clean and trimmed, but not painted. Toenails, definitely not. You may be a cop or a forest ranger.

There's the moderate level. Your hair requires some effort. You dry it with a blowdryer and some intention. You curl it and spray it if necessary (depends on your hair type). You wear simple makeup most likely bought at the grocery store, and your nails indicate some attention. Maybe they're painted (or in my case buffed), and it's possible you go to someone else to do them, but not necessarily. You could do their regimen yourself.

There's the high level. You spend a lot of money on your hair with your color, cut and products. It likely requires quite a bit of time and effort in the morning. Your nails are done at a salon and are quite possibly acrylic. Your makeup is heavy, expertly applied and bought at either Dillard's or stand-alone stores.

There are, of course, in-between stages. Maybe you color your hair, but you do it yourself, putting you between the moderate and high level. Maybe you buy expensive makeup, but don't wear a lot. But you blend from one level to another. You don't mix the basic level with the high level. It just looks weird - like you don't know what you're doing. And that's not the attention you're looking for.

Oh, and if you don't want people picking apart your grooming efforts, make sure they don't have to stand around too long with nothing to do but stare at you.

Hip(pie), Hip(pie), Hooray!

Okay, so I'm a day late in getting to this, but I just saw the show last night. YEA FOR MY HIPPIES! I was so glad they won!!

I won't do a full breakdown of the show, but a few thoughts:

- One of the frats had on a tux t-shirt during an interview. Uh...stupid.
- The elephants at Royal Kraal were great!! I want to go see elephants!
- I didn't know Tyler had a Japanese girlfriend and spoke Japanese. I'm impressed! Asian languages are very hard to learn.
- I was a little worried when BJ and Tyler got pumped about going to Japan b/c they thought they'd have an edge. As it was, it ended up helping them to make up some time, but traditionally, when a team finds out it's going some place they're familiar with, they get cocky and end up doing worse than teams that don't have an "edge." I remember a season where they went to New York for the last leg, and NY team got all excited, then they ended up not taking the best train. They just went their familiar route, and it wasn't the best choice, and they lost.
- The teams were lucky with how many people spoke English in Japan.
- Did anyone else notice the guy in one of the passing shots wearing a surgical mask?
- Not much romance goin' on in a capsule hotel.
- Fujukyu Highlands - THIS would've been my Roadblock baby! I love roller coasters!
- Frat made me laugh trying to wave at the girls a couple of seat over on the roller coaster. But he MUST have been joking when he called Tyler an idiot for letting the girls touch his beard. He was just jealous he hadn't thought to a grow a beard so he could get that kind of attention.
- Have they ever done a non-elimination round prior to the final leg, meaning that one of the 3 final teams would be racing with no possessions? I don't think so.
- The final Roadblock: the flags. That would've stumped me. I wouldn't have known all the flags.

All in all, a great season! I'm so glad they're back to form after the Family Edition debacle.

Happy wedding to you!

So, I mentioned last week that much shopping angst was going on in preparation for attending a wedding last Friday. I should say first off that the much-desired halter dress was finallly acquired at a decent price from Emerald's on Lamar. This is just down the street from By George, which, from the prices, is apparently under the impression it's clothes are spun from gold and chocolate, and Chico's, which will cater to me when I'm 50...but not now. I love my new dress and I got lots of compliments, which every girl needs, so it was all good.

The wedding was great! Laurie and Tony, you are the best, and I have no doubt that you will live a happy life together, forever and ever, amen. Angela, your toast, that their love will only grow so that they look back on their wedding day as the day they loved each other least, was wonderful. I love that sentiment, and wish for us all to find that kind of love. So many loving, mushy sentiments to ponder!

Oh, and lots of drinking, dancing, laughing and embarrassing pictures, too. The reception was great! Really, Laurie, it was one of my favorite weddings I've ever been to!

Highlights of the night: the letters read during the ceremony; the audience participation singing at the reception; the open bar of margaritas and other drinks of which I did not avail myself (the margaritas were too good); the running slideshow of pictures on the wall by the dance floor; the free form dancing, particularly Randi's (get the girl another glass of wine - it only gets more interesting as her empty glasses stack up); the perfect weather; the amazing food.

One interesting note: My butt was grabbed at least 4 times - I would've said 3 (Nikki - no surprise - Amy, and Ronnie), but Randi told me on Saturday that she grabbed it once. I don't remember that, but maybe I quite noticing after a while. Perhaps the pictures will tell the story when they get developed! Oh, and Laurie, there's no telling what will be on that film - Edgar was just wandering around taking pictures without seeming to even frame anything. That guy's a nut! (Mary Beth, you are a brave woman!)

*Note to stalker girl: Only people who know me and have established that I like them and that their butt-grabbing is not creepy may engage in the practice. If anyone un-approved touches my rearend, it gets ugly. It's a permission-only zone, and you don't have permission. Got that? Awright then. (Besides, nobody should be grabbing anyone's butt at church, and that's the only place I plan on seeing you.)

We should all hope that our weddings are that much fun, with that much love and good will and support for us!

Stalker?

Have you ever had someone who came on just a little too strong? I'm not talking about dating - guys come onto chicks too strong all the time. I'm talking about someone who you meet in some kind of non-dating situation who gloms onto you just a bit too soon and a bit too strong - wanting to have some kind of instant relationship with you, and you find yourself trying to duck them?

Me too. A few weeks ago, I was in Sunday School and a woman was visiting our class and our church, trying to find a church home. She asked some questions about our church, and we answered them, and in the process of answering one of the questions for her, I let her know I'm in a similar position to her in my life and that I find a lot of resources at this church. A lot of other people piped in with stuff, and I wasn't sure how clear we'd been, so at the end of class, I approached her and asked, "So, did we answer your questions?" She says yes. Good. Glad to be of service.

I start to leave class, and I'm talking to one of the regulars, and she walks up and just joins in. Uh...okay...havin' a conversation here. I finish my conversation with my friend, and this woman stands in front of me, just a little too close and positioned so that I'd have to get past her to leave and says, "We should keep in touch!" Um...I don't know you. Maybe you could come to class for a while, and we could get to know each other, and then if we want to try to have some sort of friendship outside of class, we could pursue that. But you're a perfect stranger I met less than an hour ago, and I've had two exchanges with. I'm not handing out my phone number and making plans with you.

I give a vague, "Yeah," and leave hurriedly without exchanging information, but something tells me this woman isn't going to give up. I can't explain it. It sounds on paper like an innocent enough exchange, but you know, sometimes you can just tell when someone is just a little too enthusiastic about you. 22 years of dating gives you the internal alarm system. And something about this woman just set my bells to ringing.

So last week, I was visiting my parents and had planned to go to church at home, but this woman immediately leapt to mind, and I just did not want to go. Maybe if she came again and I wasn't there, she'd glom onto someone else or give up. So, I skipped. How sad - pushy, borderline creepy lady keeps me from going to church.

And now we're at this week. I went to the early service and then went to Sunday School, and like some kind of hunted animal, I'm keeping an eye out for this woman. I go to our classroom, but it's too soon and no one is there yet. I don't want to get stuck alone with her if she comes to the room, so I wander back out and chat with the guy acting as greeter at the front doors. He's in our class, so I've known him for years. We're chatting, and up she walks. She asks me if I remember her, then when I say I do and I put my hand out to shake her hand, she HUGS me!!! Personal. Space.

Now there's no denying it - this woman has a way different threshold of intimacy than I do. I'm sorry - I just have to get to know people before I forge friendships and start hugging each other. I DON'T KNOW HER. And don't say, "Well, that's how you get to know people - you go do stuff." No. No, it's not - not if you know you'll both be in the same place every week. It's not necessary to cross the personal boundaries immediately when you already know you'll have the opportunity and place to build up to that. When you've got that kind of opportunity, you let it build naturally. When you start working a new job, do you run around asking people to come hang out at your house the first day you meet them? No. That would be weird. When you're that pushy to try and forge some kind of immediate, false intimacy, that's just a little off. And girlfriend's alarm bells are deafening her.

Luckily, she went to a different Sunday School class, so I was able to avoid her during the class, but after class, she stopped me in the foyer and asked me what I do in my spare time. I wanted to say, "I avoid freaks," but instead I just said how very busy I am with my many activities and friends. So very, very busy. She gives me her card, tells me how much she'd like to meet my friends and how we should keep in touch. Scary Lady, my friends are my friends because I don't inflict needy, desperate strangers on them.

I should say something here. I would never say, "I don't need anymore friends." If I meet someone I like, that I think is cool, I'd love to add to my friends. And my friends are always open to meeting a new, fun person. So, this isn't about me being closed off. And I admire this chick's assertiveness in trying to make friends. She's been in town about a year and a half she said, so it's still a somewhat new city to her, and making friends can be HARD. Meeting people, getting invited stuff, getting to be part of a group. It can be work, and sometimes it requires you to push a little. I know. I've been there. So, I pat her on the back for not just sitting around wondering, "How come I have no friends?" She's trying to do something about it. Good idea.

However. Having said that, you cannot just meet someone in a non-meat-market environment and immediately shove yourself down someone's throat. People don't like that. We're put off by it. It's too much, and it makes you appear desperate and needy, which isn't what most of us are looking to add to our lives. Before you start asking for people's contact information and their schedule, and saying you want to meet their friends and do stuff together, why don't you try chatting like a normal human being within the boundaries of the environment you're in? Give it some time - a few weeks or months to see if there's any "click." If you seem compatible and the person seems to want to talk to you (as opposed to politely acknowledging you then trying desperately to talk to someone else, like, say, I was doing), then you put it out there that it might be fun to do something. If they seem *genuinely* amenable to that, then come up with an actual activity. Invite them, then you'll get your answer. They'll go, or they won't. If they don't, *leave it alone.* They know where to find you. They know you're interested in pursuing a friendship. They either need more time to get to know you or aren't interested in return. But trying to make someone your best friend 10 seconds after you meet them? Well, that just makes them hide from church. And do you really want to be responsible for someone's soul atrophying?

Karma.

I had a family situation last night that kept me away from home, and I tried to tape TAR using my parents' VCR, but wouldn't you know I did the settings too fast and screwed it up. So, I missed the greatest episode yet! The one where karma puts the hurt on MoJo!

I read the recap on CBS, and man, am I sorry I missed it! I see that while none of the teams left the hippies any money this time, Ray and Yolie and Eric and Jeremy left them some needed clothes, while MoJo left them nothing. You reap what you sow from the universe. It's pathetic that Eric and Jeremy lied to MoJo about giving BJ sandals, though. When Monica and Joseph are the people you want to impress in life, you got problems.

I love that the frats played with the monkeys at the temple while they waited for it to open. I think I would've just wanted to stay there and play with them all day.

I see the lure of a Fast Forward at this stage of the game, but they would had to have renamed it "Suzanne Pukes." I just do NOT have it in me to eat crickets and/or grasshoppers - much less a jumbo bowl of them. I couldn't eat that much ice cream, much less insects. Would they let my cat do it in my place? She loves crickets, and she wouldn't even need them to be stir-fried or dead. Seriously, we would've lost time when I couldn't force the nasties down my throat and had to give up and go back to the Roadblock. BJ, you have my admiration for pushing through the vomit and finishing the task. You guys are made of steel.

Detour: Altar It. No question. I hear Monica had a breakdown. Poor witta Monicuh.

I'm very happy with the lineup for the final round. I'll be bummed if the frats win, happy if the hippies win, and fine with it if Ray and Yolanda win. Should be fun!

I'm female. I promise.

On the whole, I'm a pretty female-y female. I look like a girl (curves in the appropriate places), and sound like a girl (I've largely cleaned up my sailor mouth from college), and dress like a girl (I even wear dresses when I don't have to). I've watched my share of Lifetime movies and seen most episodes of "Whose Wedding Is It Anyway?" (the child of "Bridezillas"). And I read "O" magazine. I'm solidly in the XX category.

So WHY can't I shop? I try. I go to the mall. I look at stuff. I try stuff on. But I'm only good for about an hour to an hour and a half, and then I just lose all steam. I can keep walking the stores, but it's pointless. After 90 minutes, I officially don't care anymore. So, I either come across good stuff that I don't buy because my motivation is gone, or I buy stuff I don't really want and pay too much just to have it all over with.

One problem, I know, is that I often go into it knowing what I want and trying to find THAT thing. Only that thing doesn't exist. Maybe I don't know where to look. But if my staying power is only 90 minutes, I can't cut into that driving all over town to individual boutique places. If it's not at the mall, I'm probably only good for one stop. So, the free-standing boutique place better be golden. It had better meet all my needs, and that means not charging 4 times what I can pay. And what are the odds that will happen?

My shopping ineptitude was on display last night as I tramped fruitlessly around Barton Creek Mall trying to buy a new dress for a wedding I'm going to on Friday. I tried the big guns - Foley's, Dillard's, Nordstrum. I got to the point that $118 was actually looking reasonable for a springish, halter sundress (the target of my quest), and I knew I had to leave. I did find one possibility at Foley's - a Liz Clairborne number that fit the bill on the hanger. But when I tried it on, my boobs disappeared, replaced by gapping, fabric cones. I think the dress was made for someone several inches taller than I am (a common occurrence) with D size cups. I tried valiently to make it work before giving up in disgust.

Oh, and I should say that while I love Nordstrum's policy of no-hassle returns and their fab-o shoe selection, I wanted to scream as every single sales person I came upon as I browsed had to individually engage me. "Hello. Do you need a new dress?" "Hello, how are you?" "Hello. Let me know if you need a dressing room." "Hello. That's really cute isn't it." LEAVE ME ALONE! If I need anything I'LL talk to YOU!!! See. I'm just not a shopper.

One of two things happens at this point. I either try a couple of boutique places with my non-existent time between now and Friday, or I wear something I already own. I tried a few things when I got home from my mall excursion, and there are one or two things I suppose I wouldn't hate to wear, but I sure would like a new springish, halter sundress. Can't someone just read my mind, make what I want in the correct size at the correct price, and then deliver it to my house and put it in my closet?

Holy humidity, Batman!

Before I even address what I was originally going to post about - the crazy weather we're having - I must take a moment to say, "What is UP with Blogger????" It's taken me all day to get the screen to come up so I could post. Sheeeeeeeesh.

Back to our regularly scheduled programming. It's been a heck of a spring so far for us Central Texans. We came into the season in a drought - really hurtin' for water. And the past couple of weeks, that little problem has been solved, or at least improved. We've gotten a lot of rain. Like 10 inches this month, and it's only the 9th. Maybe people in Seattle are used to that, but here in the Land of the Parched Earth, that's a lot of rain. Luckily, it's spaced itself out a bit, giving us breathers for the water to soak in before the next patch of rain comes, so that we're not having flooding problems. But the mosquitos are already out in force, and that's something I could do without.

And we *are* having hail and wind problems. Two weeks ago, they had a crazy bad hail storm down the road from us in San Marcos, and it really made a mess out of people's cars and house roofs. Even traffic lights got the crap beat outta them with some of the little hoods that go on top of the lights so you can see them better getting shattered. You could even see on the pavement near the freeway where hail stones had blasted away some of the grime that had accumulated from years of car exhaust and the elements. I went to the outlet mall Saturday and thought some of the shops were abandoned until my mom told me that no, they were still open - their signs had just been destroyed. It was bad.

Then last Thursday, it came Austin's way. A huge storm with hurricane force winds (or so I'm told - about 70 mph) and hail just battered the whole area. I know people who have been without power since last Thursday because so many trees snapped power lines. A sidenote on that is that alot of people in high-dollar neighborhoods with mature trees fought the city's tree-trimming program, because they liked the leafy look of their big trees and didn't want the city doing "excessive" trimming. Now those people have been without power for almost a week (that's where the long-term outages were), and guess who some of them blame? The city. How much should people like that be slapped? But I digress.

In any case, I guess this is the first time I'm grateful that my trees are little baby trees that provide no shade and probably precious little carbon dioxide. But they stayed rooted in the ground during all that, so they get to be called Trooper Trees now! I may get to see my Trooper Trees grow into mature, leafy, shade trees someday if the home prices keep rising around town, everywhere except my neighborhood. I read a story in USA Today about how prices are rising in Austin, and I just sighed. I got my property appraisal last week, and my valuation actually went down. Depressing since the hope was that this home would be an investment - that after a few years, when the neighborhood was all built out, values would go up and I could sell and upgrade. Doesn't seem to be happening that way.

There's a state highway going in less than 2 miles from my neighborhood, and I'm hoping that will increase, not decrease, values as development pops up because of it. I'm sad for development to happen since the area around my neighborhood is rural and it's nice to feel like you're in the country. But it's even nicer to see the biggest investment I have appreciate rather than stagnate or depreciate. I'd have to take a pretty huge loss when I sell for rent to have been a better deal, so I know it wasn't a mistake to buy, and I do love the house, but I grit my teeth now when all my friends talk about how much their houses are appreciating. As Ren from "Ren and Stimpy" would say, "That's just great. For YEW!!!!!!"

Brass knuckles are expressive.

Yesterday afternoon, I hung out with some friends, and I had an exchange with one of them that really bothered me - partly because of what my friend said, and partly because of what I didn't say. This is a friend I've known for almost 20 years. We haven't been close in a long time, but we see each other at a regular gathering and keep up. Over the years, I've seen her and her husband change, as we all do. One area, in particular, where they've changed course is religion. When I first knew them, they were religious. They married in an elaborate church service with a full communion (not just for the wedding party, but for everyone in the congregation who wished to participate) and seemed to have a solid foundation of relationship with God and connection to church.

As time went by, their politics became fervently liberal and, in tandem with that, their religion fell away. Now, being liberal is not an indication of religious bent - several people in my Sunday School class who are very religious and involved with the church are also passionately liberal/Democrat, so one is not necessarily attached to the other. But for this particular couple, it seemed to be connected. Since I am a religious person, I decided as I saw this change happening that for the sake of our friendship, it would be best for us to avoid the religion/politics discussions. After all, we can still enjoy brats and football, even if we have different social and/or political views! And so it went. People growing and changing and moving in different directions, but finding common ground to enjoy together.

But yesterday, my friend breached the boundary that has been silently drawn over the years. As we sat at our social gathering, talking about books, my friend says to me that speaking of blockbuster books, she noticed driving to the gathering that a nearby church had a banner about a class at their church on debunking The DaVinci Code. I'd seen the banner and couldn't remember that it said anything about debunking - I thought it just advertised a discussion about the book, but I hadn't paid close attention so I didn't challenge her interpretation. Maybe she's right - maybe it did say that. But then she says that the fact they'd feel the need to do that shows, "They're really scared!" She said this with great enthusiasm - more than she'd shown for any topic discussed all afternoon.

I looked at her with a mix of surprise of sadness that this would be a point of glee for her. What happened exactly that made her not just decide that the church no longer held anything for her, but get to the point that she now wants to see it scared and, presumably, fall? Sci-fi isn't for me, and I don't read it, but I don't feel the need for it to be banished. I don't like olives, but I have no problem with other people enjoying them. And I'd hate living in the desert, but I don't suggest that the people who love it there should be forcibly removed. If my friend doesn't find a home in the church, there's no authority that forces her to go, so why would she be so pleased at the notion that religion might take a body blow from some piece of fiction? What is the desire to see the thing you don't agree with destroyed? I thought the liberal creed was tolerance?

And who, exactly, is "they"? This particular church? All churches? All Christians? Because I'm a Christian, and I'm not scared for the future of my religion because someone wrote a novel. My religion isn't like some, where we put out a fatwa on people who write books aimed at our religion. We don't riot when offensive cartoons are published about us. We talk about it. That doesn't sound like a religion on the rocks. And my church also has classes for discussing the novel, and I've not gotten the impression for a moment that my church is scared. It's just a really popular book about the very subject the organization is founded on - Jesus. So, why would they NOT discuss it? When The Passion of the Christ came out and was such a big deal, they discussed that. They have lots of classes discussing literature, so how weird would it be if they ignored the book that was about the subject they're most interested in? If the congregation is reading it, and may have questions, what better place to open up the discussion and address them?

I said to my friend, "Well, I don't think they're scared. Maybe offended." And she says, "Okay, maybe not scared. But they're threatened." Now, this is when I *should* have said what I just said above. But I didn't. I didn't want to get into some conflict at a social gathering, so I just mumbled, "I don't know. Maybe." with a tone that indicated I didn't really think "maybe" but wasn't going to discuss it any further, and I looked away as if I was suddenly very interested in the conversation happening across from me. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw her raise her hands and then let them flop back into her lap like "Whatever."

That was the end of the conversation, but it ate at me. It ate at me in part because as a Christian, I should've done a better job defending my religion and pointing out that the very fact we're talking about the book, whether to "debunk" it or just to talk about the issues it raises, is proof that we're not extremists. Instead of calling for the head of whoever wrote it, we're buying it, reading it, discussing it. We're enlightening ourselves, asking questions, looking for answers. That's not fear. That's not anger. You can be offended by something. But what comes after the natural, emotional reaction of offense? Apparently, it's the desire for enlightenment. I'm proud of my church for engaging in the world it lives - for discussing the issues of our day, be it tough social issues or literature. I'm frustrated that we're so very misunderstood or mischaracterized by the secular world. And there I sat, with an opportunity to at least try and put something else out there to counteract the negative spin, and I didn't take it.

I'm also frustrated because I do that alot. There are lots of times that I have opinions and thoughts and the opportunity to voice them and I don't. And I've found over the years, that sometimes people underestimate my intelligence or my seriousness because I don't speak up. Yet, I've sometimes been discouraged by the times that I have stood my ground and argued my side. Two times I remember specifically when I went ahead and participated in the debate. Once I was chastised later for it by my boyfriend (apparently I was supposed to just be pretty while his friends were allowed to spout off about the issues of the day), and another time a friend later told me that her husband described me as "crazy" because I'd shown emotion during the debate (keep in mind, I didn't yell or get physical, I didn't stomp out, I didn't name-call or tell anyone to shut up - I simply had passion in defending my side). Yet, strangely, she told me her husband enjoys having regular, spirited debates with one of her other, female friends who I know to be highly emotional, and she even told me he enjoys setting this girl off. So, I just don't understand that whole experience.

Usually, I don't engage because I'm in a social environment, and I don't want to ruin the evening by getting into an argument. And that's what debates feel like to me - arguments, aimed at convincing the other person of your opinion with no interest in learning anything yourself. It's about winning - not gathering information. A lot of people love debate. I don't. I hate it. I always have. I've learned as an adult to deal with confrontation when I have to, and I do, and I think I do it pretty well. But I despise conflict, and I feel things passionately, so when I get into a debate about some big issue, it's very hard for me to not take it personally when someone attacks what I believe or think or am, and it's hard for me to just dissipate all the passion and adrenalin and (often negative) energy that gets stirred up. So, while some people think debate is fun, to me it's torture. And I want to enjoy my time. Not to mention, I don't have an encyclopedic memory for all the facts, people, dates and history I need at my disposal to confidently support every opinion I hold. I try to gather information, hear both sides, and form an opinion. So, I have an opinion, and it's an informed one, but I just don't have the kind of memory where I can recite back every fact that went into consideration of the subject, and in a debate, if you can't pull up every little piece of data, you're often labeled as "uninformed" and your arguments dismissed out of hand when that may not be true at all.

(sigh) So, the bottom line is that I hate debate, yet I feel I do a disservice sometimes to the causes I believe in by not engaging in it. I love to learn, and I spend a lot of time educating myself about a lot of different things. I'm intelligent and thoughtful and have opinions, but I hate to fight. If enjoyment of conflict were an indication of intelligence, Mike Tyson would be a freakin scholar. I guess I need to spend some time thinking about how I can better handle those situations - when someone expresses an opinion that I patently disagree with and one that legitimately deserves a response, without having my whole day ruined by an unpleasant exchange. I'm tired of everyone else being entitled to express themselves without worrying who they'll offend, while I bite my tongue at my own expense.

Update: I learned today that a Catholic Cardinal is actually encouraging good Catholics to file lawsuits against the movie The Da Vinci Code because ... it offends their faith, I think? I don't even know exactly what the legal basis of the lawsuit would be, since I assume some sort of harm has to have happened. And it doesn't even really matter what the trumped up reason would be because it's just ridiculous to sue someone because their art offends you. I was as offended as the next modest female when I saw the "Britney Giving Birth" (or whatever it was called) statue, but you don't sue over it. Just don't go see it. And I think he suggested a boycott, too. Fine. Don't see the movie. That's fair. But really, let's not clog up the courts with this kind of absurdity. I'm not sure what country he'd want these lawsuits filed in, but in the U.S. we have a little thing called "freedom of expression." You're allowed to write or film something that some people won't like - particularly if people have to pay to even see it, meaning you'd have to go out of your way to gain access to the material. No, lawsuits and boycotts are not on par with fatwas and riots, but they're attempts to silence voices you don't like, and let's not play that game, shall we?

Whew!

I'll just start off with the most important fact of last night's Amazing Race, and then I'll move on to my recap: the hippies escaped elimination again!!! They got me this season by putting the two non-elim rounds so close to one another and so close to the end of the race. I didn't expect that last night and was sooooo happy! :)

Okay, so we started the round by traveling to Swan Bells. I pretty much figured when Phil explained the task that the bells would have operating hours, allowing everyone to catch up. They did. MoJo has gotten seriously hostile toward the hippies, and I just do not get why. I understand them being angry when they got yielded, but their anger started long before then, and I've always said yielding is just part of the game anyway. But that aside, those two need to take some Nice Pills.

I've been proud of the way my hippies have played the game until last night when they tried to stir up dissension by starting a rumor about Eric and Monica. That's not cool, and they're better than that. Also, trying to take Mojo's cab when it was clear it was Mojo's? Tsk, tsk boys.

Eric and Jeremy are a-holes. Cancelling everyone's taxis is cheating in my book. That's like stealing people's money. That's no longer "playing the game." And it was SUCH karma that their taxi didn't show either! I might've felt bad for Mojo for getting the blame on that except that they're just such jerks, they sort of invite people to think something like that about them. Nobody would ever think Ray and Yo would do something like that, even if they had the only cab that showed up. You get back what you put out there, people.

How about that airport worker asking MoJo for a bribe?! And on camera! What is Australia now...Mexico? It was pretty funny, though, when they offered a kiss from Monica to the guy as a bribe and he just looked at her totally unimpressed. I'll bet Ms. Thang ain't used to that!

Crocodyle Park. Again, a place with operating hours and the chance for everyone to catch up. If this were a Roadblock, I SO would have had my partner do the task of wading through the crocs instead of me! As it was, I was suprised Monica had the gumption to do it.

Batchelor. Hippies yield Mojo. Yeah, they did. And forgive me if I can't find my sympathy for them. I wanted to slap Monica when she whined about how "It's not fair," that the hippies stopped their car sooner and ran and got to the Yield first. How is it unfair to stop your car further back? Oh, and don't even act like the hippies are jerks for yielding you - you SO would've done the same thing if you'd gotten there first! You're so much more hostile than the hips. Or when you said to Tyler that if y'all weren't in the race, "I'd beat you down," did you mean at cards? It was beautiful when you missed the sand running out on your timer because you were arguing.

Roadblock: Skydive. This is becoming a refrain for me, but gotta toss that one to my partner. I'm not good with heights, and hurling myself out of an airplane is not on my lists of things I must do before I die. Interesting "on the ground" action, why was Jeremy flirting with Yolanda? What was that?

Magnetic Termite Mounds. Those were freaky! I had no idea that's what termite mounds look like. I wonder why they build them like that - seems inefficient.

Detour: Wet or Dry. I would've chosen Wet, and it would've been a bad choice. Normally, I don't choose the super-physical tasks. You tire yourself out and waste time if you can't do it and have to switch. But I figured the swimming sounded okay, because I'm a good swimmer. But since both teams that chose that fell behind, clearly the aboriginal horns were the better choice. Oh, and Yolanda said she can't swim. I may have addressed this back in Russia, but who does this race if they can't swim? Swimming and driving stick - might want to learn those before going on TAR.

Pit Stop: Lake Bennett. Phil dodging the lasso guy was pretty funny. Ray and Yo coming in first was cool, and the Mercedes lease seemed to be just what they both wanted, so that was cool. How big a jerk is Joseph - flipping off the hippies for no reason whatsoever as they drove down the road? BOY that guy's karma must be rancid. It was so great when he thought the hippies were out, and then they weren't!

Here's hoping the Hips can pull magic again next leg and stay in it.

Try switching to hybrid vehicles.

The friggin' postal service is wanting to increase stamp prices AGAIN!! Did we not cover this just a few months ago in one of my posts? They want to hike it to 42 cents next May.

They're actually trying to blame it on the increased fuel prices this time. Fine. It costs too much to drive those little Jeeps around (or reimburse their people and contractors for driving their own cars)? Then issue your people the little number I alerted you all to last month. Give them ZAP Smart Cars! Who cares if they're fashionable? They'd be WORK vehicles! UPS doesn't concern themselves with whether their vans are in fashion.

Or better yet, switch to hybrid or electric cars, like the hideous golfcart thing GM markets, the GEM. Letter carriers (because you can't call them postmen anymore) drive the same short route everyday (short compared to some people's commutes or, say, the miles a Realtor has to drive every day). The distance they need to drive to deliver the mail would work just fine for one of these little things. And they're stopping constantly - they don't need a fast vehicle or something with some great acceleration ratio. And the Web site shows that some have little haulers on the back. They're perfect!

I realize this wouldn't change the cost of the planes and 18-wheelers that they have to use, but it'd have to make a dent. And considering how they're constantly falling behind both with their product (again, see my previous post about how I started doing auto-charges for some of my bills to decrease my bill-mailing costs) and their efficiency, they need to make some dents. Maybe those of us ponying up for those stamps would feel a little better about it if we saw them tooling around in electric cars and we could see that they're actually making some kind of attempt to control costs, not just passing expenses on to us. Grrrrrr.