Got to reference a little "News of the Weird" this morning - mostly because all I can think about right now are my sinuses and Hurricane Ike, and I don't feel like blogging about either of those. So, thank heaven for Don Gorske.
Don's got obsessive-compulsive disorder, and he says that it's driven him to eat 23,000 Big Macs in 36 years. He's even kept every receipt in a box.
"The correctional-institution employee says he doesn't care when people call his Big Mac obsession crazy. He says he's in love with the burgers, which are the highlights of his days."
Yes, Don. You are in love with the burgers, which is why I'm going to guess that you do not have a girlfriend. I could be wrong. But I don't think so, what with the burger being the highlight of your day.
I'm also going to guess that 23,000 Big Macs has made you a whole lotta man - another possible reason why the Big Macs are your girlfriend. A Big Mac doesn't care how much you weigh, does it, Don? A Big Mac never says to you, "Maybe you should have a salad, hon - with some grilled chicken maybe?"
This is one of those moments where I thank God (and I mean that literally) that I am who I am, with my mental health intact, and a really great life that I actually enjoy - where the highlight of my day does not involve 2 all-beef patties or special sauce. Okay, sometimes there's special sauce, but it doesn't taste like Thousand Island dressing.
2 comments:
LOL! I love the last line... You're funny honey...
J
I think I've eaten all of about 2 Big Macs in my life, and that was only because they ordered one for everyone in the band. Really, who needs that much burger???
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