NOW you call.

So, I gave up on selling my house for now. It sat on the market for five months, with very few lookers and no offers, so I said "forget it" and took it off the market yesterday.

I don't know if you've ever sold a house, but it's kind of a pain in the butt. It has to be "show ready" at all times. You have to assume every day as you leave to go to work that someone might come and look at it that day, so you can't leave your dirty clothes around or leave the dishes soaking with the thought, "I'll clean that up when I get home tonight" or let sensitive financial or personal papers sitting out in your office to be filed at a more convenient time. All your personal photos and knicknacks have to be boxed and put away so buyers can picture themselves instead of you in the house and so things don't look cluttered.

The problem is that if you're actually living in the house, you might need some of the stuff you've had to box up, and maybe you WANT to look at pictures of your friends and family instead of some landscape portrait. Maybe you don't want to have to think about whether what you made for dinner last night will smell appealing to whoever looks at the house today. Maybe you don't want to hand out your alarm code to strangers but don't particularly want to leave your house un-alarmed all the time. I actually had one Realtor forget to lock the front door when they left after a showing this summer.

And all of this for less than one showing a week. I could probably count in single digits the number of showings that occurred for my house in the 5 months it was on the market. So, I had enough. If it's not going to sell, and clearly right now isn't the time, I wanted my house back. So, I had my Realtor remove it yesterday and the sign came out of the yard last night, and the lockbox should be off the door any day now. Peace and tranquility again, right?

Well, would you believe that I've already had two calls this morning from other Realtors who want me re-list with them? Where were these people when I needed a buyer? Do you have a buyer for my house? Are you calling to make an offer? No? Well, then don't bother me! The first one makes his canned pitch about why I should re-list with him and all they'll do for me, and when I say no, thank you, he starts quizzing me about why. Um...do I owe you an explanation? No, I do not. For the time being, I'm OUT of the house-selling business! I'm going to relax for a change and actually LIVE in my house for the first time in 5 months!

Now, if you want to call me with a generous offer, then great. Make me a deal! But for the rest of the day, I'm not answering the phone if I don't recognize the number, because I'm not going to be harrassed all day by vultures who couldn't be bothered to bring a buyer around when I was on the market. Ugh.