The Frats are in the finals??? WHAT???

Well, I really can't believe how this week's Amazing Race turned out. It's just unbelievable that the Frats can still be in this thing. They have to be one of the worst teams to ever run this thing, and I'm just staggered they've survived. But let's talk about how they pulled it off this week.

Cab it to a Russian submarine. As always, teams are at the mercy of their cabbies, and all but one team ended up on the submarine at the same time. Considering the size of a submarine, it's a little suprising they all ended up in the same room getting their clues at pretty much the same time, but so goes it.

Cab it to the Graveyard of Fallen Monuments for a Roadblock. What a weird place, huh? I mean, what's the deal? If some monument gets replaced, the old one goes to this park? Are they afraid if they destroy a likeness of Lenin or Stalin, the old psychos will return to haunt them? How about if they just called it Graveyard of Monuments to Tyrants? In any case, J and I agreed that I'd have rocked at this Roadblock. I know what Lenin and Stalin look like and I have an eye for detail, so I think I would've gotten through this quickly.

During this Roadblock is where Toni and Dallas made their fatal mistake. Dallas held all the passports and money for his team, which he managed to leave in a cab. This happened not because Dallas is a moron, because anyone could be moving fast and focused on the task and leave something behind. This happened because Toni and Dallas broke an absolute tenet of traveling in a foreign country. Keep your passport and your money ON YOU. And with the money, DIVIDE IT UP.

Don't let anyone carry your passport for you, and don't carry it in a bag or anywhere it could fall out or get left somewhere. Keep it on your person. And with money, never have one person holding it all, and never have your entire stash in one spot. Put some in your pocket, some in your shoe, some wherever you've stashed your passport. If you've got a safe at your hotel, put some of it in there. If you have a bag and you want your money in it for easy access, then fine, but only put a portion of it in there for precisely the reason of what happened to Dallas. If you have all of your valuables in one spot, it could be breached or lost and you're screwed. So like your investments, spread it around.

I'm pretty sure it was this error that cost Toni and Dallas the game, though I suppose if they hadn't made the error of taking the metro to the Shetland pony lady (see below), they probably could've passed Dan and Andrew and finished ahead of them. But I also think the time they spent begging for money to get the places they needed to go cost them too much time. Though I must comment on how amazingly generous all the people in Russia were. I maintain it's the cameras - people know it's a TV show and that the players aren't just some cons or vagrants, so they're more willing to give up some cash to the cause. Plus they want to look good on camera. They're afraid they'll look like jerks saying no. In any case, though, T&D seemed to have little trouble getting money from strangers. But just having to take the time to ask cost them.

An observation about the book shop part of this task. When Tina guessed the right number and then told Dallas the answer and proceeded to tell him he owed her, then bragged to Toni about giving him the answer, did anyone feel like they were back at the airport in the early part of the season when she bragged to everyone that she'd gotten the airline to give them a bigger plane? That woman is SO annoying! She can't do anything without needing credit, and then she had the balls to complain that Ken never says anything supportive when he's constantly building her up, and I have yet to hear her acknowledge any of the good things he does. She never cheers him on or tells him he did a great job or anything. It's just pretty much a constant stream of nagging.

Travel to park and find lady with Shetland pony. Starr didn't know a Shetland pony was a real horse. She thought it might be a ponytail. Seriously, Starr? This is where the Frats had to do their extra task. It involved dancing. I'm suprised Andrew didn't kill himself trying to dance considering his marching performance.

Detour: Ride the Lines or Ride the Rails. I think I would've picked Ride the Rails, because I do love-a the subway, though I admit I'd have been intimidated by the Cyrillic writing everywhere. It would have been easy to make a mistake. And there's a fair chance I would've eaten the samsa, so I hope the clue was clear that you had to give it to the lady at the end to get your next clue.

Travel from DKNY Park, I mean VNDKh Park, to the Pit Stop. Nick and Starr easily cruise to the Pit Stop first and win yet another trip. I think these two are definitely the favorites to win the whole thing. The Frats came in *second* (staggering, I tell you) because Ken and Tina couldn't find the cluebox (I'm sure it was all Ken's fault, right Tina?). J and I hoped that Dallas and Toni might get there before they found it because while we like Ken, we can't stand Tina, but no such luck. They were just too handicapped without their money and passports.

They had a pretty amazing experience, though, and won and extra trip along the way, so it's all good. It's not a million dollars, but it was a pretty great ride for them, no?